Bienvenido a viernes amigos.
Time to rejoice your internal Mexican, peoples. Seize your sombreros, put together the nachos, wash all of it down with a tequila shot or two and lock your underpaid and unlawful home servants within the basement, as this Friday’s Rugby Information heads south to the sporting capital of Victoria: Melbourne
First up at present we take a look at a the scourge infecting the Tahs with: ‘The Kicking Curse’. Have a look at the groups, instances and fearless predictions for this weekend’s SRP Tremendous Spherical in ‘Anybody Dwelling?’. We take an intimate look into the lifetime of a rugby referee with ‘So Ronery’. Then bounce throughout the globe for a more in-depth take a look at a French theft in ‘The Italian Job’. And wrap up one other week with a jam-packed ‘Friday’s Goss with Hoss’, nonetheless formally unnamed by ASIO.
The Kicking Curse.
I had the misfortune of visiting Australia’s Dengue Fever capital final weekend and ‘loved’ 114% humidity, Yowie’s firm and received to witness first hand an ailment that inflicted Tah sides for much too lengthy: shite kicking. Really it wasn’t simply that, it was additionally the numerous ‘dumb’ kicks as properly.
No different SRP facet has the propensity for its sport managers to kick so constantly poorly because the Tahs do. And it’s not solely the poor execution, it’s the entire lack of rugby nous to know when to roost it, towards when to carry it. Extra usually then not they’re kicking when the sport dynamic, or alternative at that second, dictates they need to do something however kick the capsule.
Now I do know Spanners Foley has left the Tahs, however the ghost of Spanners nonetheless haunts this franchise. Final week in BrisVegas, I might have sworn Spanners was nonetheless within the sky blue of the Tahs so dangerous was the kicking. And it wasn’t simply Ed Sheeran @ #10, but additionally Jake ‘Commissioner’ Gordon and serial recidivist Joey ‘Jon-Boy’ Walton.
There have been all the same old traits on show. The shanked 12 metre contact finder from a terrific angle, when any form of half-decent kick would have discovered the Tahs 10m out and with an attacking lineout. There was the same old missed contact finder from a penalty kick. There have been field kicks too deep to problem, clearing kicks down the pipe of one of many Commies again three. There have been kicks on turnover capsule 40 out from the Reds line. There have been kicks once we had (uncommon) penalty benefit. Simply on that I hear Izzy Perese has been cited for giving himself concussion. Apparently The Squatter has no case to reply as Perese clearly attacked the highest of Paisami’s head together with his personal chin!
And so it was halfway via the second half with the Tahs nonetheless within the contest and 40m out from the Commies line and only some phases in, so what does JBW do? Naturally, he kicks it. He doesn’t kick for his outdoors man, he doesn’t ‘kick move’ it as Finn Russell so sublimely executes. He doesn’t kick so his facet can problem it or regather it. He doesn’t kick for territory, he simply kicks it. Certainly I doubt he even is aware of why he kicked it in any respect.
And so it got here to move that one Jordan of Nazareth has the aimless kick coated. JON then pulls the sweetest of ‘soccer’ strikes out of his massive bottom; he hits it as candy, as flush and with the identical innate timing that ‘Nemesis’ hit the Liberal Celebration and hammers it 50-60m downfield. The strike lands pure, simply inside contact and the historical past books present the Tahs lose extra territory than First Nations folks did to the Ardani coal mine. However extra than simply territory, all momentum was additionally misplaced, maybe too was perception, definitely the wind had gone from the sails. All from an aimless, futile and listless kick as soon as extra.
Drained, jaded and able to strangle their sport managers, who kick extra erratically than Barnaby Joyce does when it’s instructed he quit the sauce some time, the Tahs forwards put it in reverse and trudge again deep in their very own half. And what occurs subsequent, proper on cue? They lose their very own lineout throw and two phases later, our subsequent gold #7 and MOTM Fraser-somebody, will get a deserved meat pie and it’s ‘goodnight nurse’.
Simply the place did this entire sequence of occasions have its origins once more?
It drives me insane and it’s repeated, week, after week, after week, after week. I first seen it when Spanners was on the Tahs, one thing he then contaminated the Wallabies with. Generally his kicks have been so dangerous, he wouldn’t kick it in any respect, however that’s one other story. One other of the Tahs, turned Wallaby, turned Bathroom Lothario, would additionally endlessly put in aimless grubber upon grubber, upon grubber each in blue and orange jersey. Normally simply gifting opposition the capsule in nice area place. It’s a kicking curse that’s contaminated the NSW facet for a minimum of a decade. And nobody appears to be doing something about this kicking curse.
For the love of (insert deity right here) should you’re going to kick it, kick it for contested possession, kick it for territorial or attacking achieve. In case you’re going to kick to alleviate strain, then kick it into row H. The brand new legal guidelines are going to reward bold and aggressive ‘kick returns’ and punish poor kicks or poor kick chase and that folk, the Tahs have in abundance as evidenced at Suncorp.
If the Tahs are going to proceed to kick dumb, like final Saturday then a spot outdoors the finals beckons this yr. As a result of groups, particularly Kiwi groups, will eat them alive.
Anybody Dwelling?
Famed for its world report lockdowns, gangland hits, pitch invasions, skill to insult international tennis gamers and different stuff nobody actually cares about, Mexico will once more host this yr’s Tremendous Rugby’s Tremendous Spherical, however for the final time. Sounds tremendous.
Followers from all around the world, properly unemployed Kiwis who bludge on our welfare, will pack out eight rows of AAMI stadium because the groups go head to chin face to face for this weekend’s rugby competition. After final weekend are Oz followers buoyed or bothered by your facet’s possibilities now the goat shaggers have landed right here en masse? Finest you learn on methinks.
Groups – Pleased’s article yesterday had all of the group information. And its to not late to hitch the G&GR SRP Tipping comp and Fantasy League.
Friday 1 March 6:00 pm AEDT – Highlanders v Blues at AAMI Park on Stan Sport
Fearless Prediction: Blues by 16
Referee: Angus Gardner Assistant Referees: Damon Murphy, Marcus Playle.
Friday 1 March 8:10 pm AEDT – Melbourne Rebels v Western Power at AAMI Park on Stan Sport
The Rebels have been horrid final week and albeit went lacking up entrance. Did they struggle too exhausting, did outdoors noise show to a lot to hold? Who the hell is aware of, however they have been rank and fortunate to not have 50 placed on them.
The Power, properly their propping shares are wafer skinny. They don’t have the cattle, full cease, finish of story. They may be okay from #6-15, however who’s going to win them sufficient ball to play rugby?
Fearless Predictions: Rebels by 19 and may the Rebels fluff their traces once more? Final one out flip off the lights.
Referee: Nic Berry Assistant Referees: James Doleman, Reuben Keane
Saturday 2 March 5:00 pm AEDT – Moana Pasifika v Fijian Drua at AAMI Park on Stan Sport
MP have been in it as much as their necks final week and look to have improved over final yr’s woeful season, however they should. The Drua have been properly off the tempo, however they’re nonetheless each supreme athletes and rugby gamers and this may very well be a cracking and excessive scoring affair.
Fearless Prediction: Drua by 5 and rating at fulltime to steal it.
Referee: James Mabey Assistant Referees: Damon Murphy, Mike Winter
Saturday 2 March 7:35 pm AEDT – Crusaders v NSW Waratahs at AAMI Park on Stan Sport and the 9 Community
Arduous to gauge? Nicely, probably not.
The Tahs received beat up by the situations, an lively and revitalised Reds facet and their very own gamers carrying jerseys #9, #10 & #12 hell bent on giving the ball again to the Reds in actually beneficial areas of the sector. Simply so the Tahs forwards might make much more tackles in Darwinesque situations!
There have been flashes of some good rugby and a few excellent efforts within the forwards, however sprinkled with the manure of shite kicks, so it was actually exhausting to get a kind line. And look, the Crusaders now are kinda ‘Saders-light’ in comparison with current years ain’t they? They’ve received the 2 outdated guys from the Muppets as their prop reserves. No Whitelock, Jordan or Princess Mo’unga. Apart from, Rob Penney received sacked by the Tahs, so how good a coach can he actually be?
Fearless Prediction: Tahs by 17. That’s if they’ll kind out the kicking curse and pronto. In any other case…….
Referee: Brendon Pickerill Assistant Referees: Dan Waenga, Marcus Playle
Sunday 3 March 2:00 pm AEDT – Chiefs v ACT Brumbies at AAMI Park on Stan Sport
Sport of the spherical by some margin. The 2 early tempo setters. Each are of their stride already. I actually loved Noah 2.0 enjoying a lot flatter on the line and underplaying his hand to the good thing about these round him final week. He regarded sharp, assured and really clear on his sport. Definitely he beat Flash Gordon by a long way within the battle of the #10s. It wasn’t a TKO both, it was an early rounds knockout.
Toole’s first strive was a factor of magnificence. Somebody assist his D and we’ve got one Wallaby winger locked away already. Their ain’t no substitute for displacement and this child’s received gasoline. Correct grass-scorching acceleration.
Additionally impressed with the debut of Charlie Cale. An #8’s received no proper to attain that first strive of his. Abilities, tempo and a giant engine. Watch this area.
The Chuffs have been superior towards this yr’s sixth positioned finishers, the Crusaders. At one stage it regarded prefer it might blow out in favour of the Chiefs, however the Saders do what the Saders do and it went right down to the wire and an superior first up match for 2024.
This shall be a ding-dong battle and received’t be settled until the 84th minute methinks.
Fearless Prediction: Brumbies by 3 after a number of lead modifications.
Referee: James Doleman Assistant Referees: Mike Winter, Dan Waenga
Sunday 3 March 4:30 pm AEDT – Hurricanes v Queensland Reds at AAMI Park on Stan Sport
Hmmm, it appears one win and the entire communist state is affected by untimely celebration and a pointy spike in cousins procreating.
So depressed, so downtrodden, so abjectly depressing of their sorry excuse of a life are the residents of Northern Cuba that one win, at house, with a pleasant ref ready to let foul play go and with stifling humidity means they’re the brand new champions?
I need to admit in Liam Wright, his brother Fraser and supported by Gunnedah turncoat Soiled Harry Wilson they’ve among the many greatest unfastened trio in all Tremendous Rugby. They usually play like that too. And the star of the trio in my blue eyed opinion? One L Wright. This man is each inch the Scott Fardy of at present and he will get SFA plaudits for it. He calls the lineout, he jumps, by no means misses a sort out, cleans out, hyperlinks with the fairies and all of the whereas is basically unseen by even his personal followers. Reckon he received’t be unseen by St Joe Schmidt although and that may be simply rewards.
The Canes? Pffft, no Ardie Savea, no likelihood. Apart from, should you can beat the Tahs, the Canes shall be a doddle.
Fearless Prediction: Reds by 9 and so it begins.
Referee: Jordan Means Assistant Referees: Nic Berry, Damon Murph
So Ronery.
Been a rising crescendo in media of late referring to the therapy and sickening vile threats to rugby union match officers. I admit now and again I’ve had a tanty or two or these pages, often round All Black Fanboy #1, Nigel Owens, or the French non permanent regulation inventor Monsieur Raynal. However make a loss of life menace or carry an officers households into it? No manner, a minimum of that they’ll show anyway.
So it was refreshing for me to take heed to referee Graham Cooper on The Dropped Kickoff Podcast this week with Nick and RA’s Neil Whiting. My ears actually pricked up when he made the salient level that ‘refs are additionally followers of the sport’. And I definitely have tended to overlook that bit.
So this week, for one thing completely different, a tribute to the pea blowers. And acknowledgement for the time invested so we will take pleasure in rugby. The sacrifices they make when away from family members and their information canines. The flack they undeservedly cop (besides you Raynal) and the hassle and dedication on present each week to assist make our nice sport greaterer.
And a reminder should you don’t assume it takes a psychological toll, assume once more. Right here’s Australia’s most interesting pea blower Gus Gardner speaking to himself, he’s simply so ronery. Actually confronting stuff. Who’d be a ref huh!
Angus Gardner – shadow reffing.
The Italian Job.
It will seem France with no Dupont is sort of a motorcycle with one wheel. It kinda works, form of, however bloody hell it makes for an uncomfortable journey.
To place it bluntly: Italy was robbed, or as they are saying in Italian ‘we needa extra concrete?’
The Italians completely tackled their hearts out final weekend in Lille, just for their kicker Paolo Garbisi to be denied by the mix of a submit, a wobbly kicking tee, a wandering Frog water boy, the shot clock, one other Frog participant strolling instantly in direction of the kicker and a ref who shelved the whistle on the loss of life. Other than all of that, you then had the shadow of historical past beckoning, to be without end etched within the historical past books of Italian rugby as ‘the person’, it actually was a ‘sitter’.
With scores locked at 13 all, having simply received a turnover, 28m out and 15m to the left of the French upright it regarded seemingly that the mighty Azurri have been about to pants France at house for the first time ever!
Les Frogs went right down to 14 gamers proper on halftime when French Hunter Paisami, Jonathan Danty, made an upright sort out with direct head-on-head contact on Juan Ignacio Brex. He was given a yellow card, which was virtually immediately upgraded by the bunker to a purple.
France performed properly sufficient within the first half to counsel a complete victory regarded seemingly, however the Italians tackled with steely resolve, dedication and a dedication to do the nation proud, one thing that Alfa Romeo actually ought to look into.
But it surely wasn’t to be. The scores completed at 13-13. Paolo Garbisi even apologised to his group and followers. And so it was that the French averted embarrassment and mock, the like of which has not been seen since 1939-45.
You’ll be able to watch the ultimate moments and the kick, courtesy of Elon Musk Tube
Friday’s Goss with Hoss.
Kiss and Make Up.
New Reds saviour, after a staggering and record-equalling one win in a row, Wendy Matthews, affords an attention-grabbing perception into the ‘snobbery’ of a loig boy attempting to make it large in union. SMH has extra.
Quick for his weight?
Look, as a fellow sufferer of a lowish top to weight ratio, I’m in no place to query the rising girth of a current Rebels prop signing. However, watching final week I might swear that the gent in query has been in a relatively good paddock throughout the off season and feed has been bountiful.
Izaac Quadda
No luck in any respect for the large Power lock. On the verge of a comeback after lengthy damage the large unit has injured his quad and received’t seemingly be again till March 23. Right here’s hoping he can get some sport time and push his manner again in direction of the orange jersey.
Penney on your ideas?
Spare a thought for former Tahs coach Rob Penney when his Crusaders tackle the Tahs this weekend. As a Tahs fan I believed he was a great man and a great coach who, like many Kiwi coaches right here (hmmmm), copped it within the neck for no purpose in any respect. stiff.co.nz has extra
Faz Racing Away.
The person who places the ‘no’ into ‘no arms tackles’, Mr Owen Farrell has introduced he’s off to Racing 92 subsequent yr. Faz clocks up sport quantity #250 for Saracens in March and say what you’ll, that and his take a look at report make him a participant of some be aware, expertise and longevity.
Houston, are available Houston.
Expertise is nice, properly, when it really works anyway. A little bit of a ruckus about Anton Leinert-Brown’s elimination from the sector at a vital time final week for a HIA, from information recorded from his sensible mouthguard. Seems the info truly associated to an earlier impression, however the information was ‘delayed’ from the mouthguard to the ‘responder’ inflicting a considerably stunned ALB being yanked a while later.
Any thought is barely ever pretty much as good as its implementation. stiff.co.nz has extra.
Christmas is Coming
Don’t get caught brief once more. Present your family members how a lot you care about your self and purchase some G&GR merchandise, as seen on STAN’s ‘Between Two Posts’ final Monday Night time.
Till subsequent week. Come on Aussies and go the Tahs.
Hoss – out.