Good morning world.
In the event you’re studying this then I’m useless, mind useless that’s. For I’ve entered a world the place the clocks are sluggish and the inhabitants even slower: the Queensland Individuals’s Republic of Queensland (QPRQ). What higher strategy to have fun a successful rugby season for the Tahs than by flying into the guts of enemy territory to cheer on my beloved and unbackable favorite NSW facet.
However first there’s Friday’s Rugby Information to get by way of, so let’s kick off by donning the TV critic hat for ‘An Unpolished Turd’. Launch the SRP season and our first fearless predictions in ‘The Hosstradamus Prophecies’. Take a look at the regulation of unintended penalties with ‘What a Mouthful’. And exert monopoly strain with the one and solely market goliath, ‘Friday’s Goss with Hoss’, up yours ACCC.
An Unpolished Turd.
Simply whenever you thought you’d escaped the insipid, mendacity, traitorous Turd, he’s again once more. And if this doco proved something, it’s that some turds merely can’t be polished.
Earlier than I soar in head first, I ought to maybe backtrack a bit by saying my admiration and respect for the gamers has grown. And for my very own expertise, the doco was a well timed reminder, that I’m a fan of those guys. A pure, devoted, unabashed fan.
I absolutely anticipated from our World Cup circus and with all that has transpired since, that this present would almost definitely rile me. His mendacity, his picks, his sanctimonious media performances. I like to recommend you try Natho’s face throughout that airport press convention. The digicam pans to Mr Williamson, who I consider at that very second, might have by chance ‘touched material’ throughout an unanticipated bowel expertise, brought on by the media efficiency he witnessed that day. To the monotonous repetition of ”keep in mind this sense boys” after each loss. The whole and utter hollowness of his speeches. Even simply listening to his voice was sufficient to rile me.
And rile me it has.
Many of the present was pretty ho-hum and truly fairly vanilla. There’s Flash Gordon taking part in golf with extra certainty than his catching, passing, kicking or working in opposition to the Fijians. There’s the sinking feeling when 7As does his knee in opposition to the ABs and his realisation his World Cup is completed. I additionally discovered particular moments and perception into the tenderness and vulnerability of Nella one thing to pay attention to, a 150kg rampaging prop, but mild and respectful with all, regardless of his frustrations round his mounting accidents and incapability to affect outcomes on the sector. Nic White was enjoyable to look at and I’d like to share a drink or three with him a while. However the actual star of the present is Jimmy Slips; powerful, devoted, humble and steely. He gave his all to the marketing campaign, in physique, thoughts and in sheer bloody-minded will. He speaks with authority and readability and with a brutal openness, but blames nobody whereas doing so. That’s a gentleman there, of us. Behold and be grateful for.
To the precise idea itself: it appears the manufacturing firm will need to have thought early on that they have been going to be aware about greatness, be a fly on the wall to historical past and witness a ‘snatch and seize’ marketing campaign on the RWC. A rooky workforce, underdogs, a rag-tag group of Aussies, defying the percentages, rising above their station and successful the trophy that signifies World Rugby domination. Who wouldn’t need to seize that?
As an alternative what we get to witness was a sluggish movement automotive crash of Crew Wallaby. The ramblings of a lunatic and the harm he brought on to the workforce, the code and the model in each the instant and long run. In spite of everything, even for non-rugby followers, the Wallabies have perpetually been the nationwide workforce of selection, collectively ‘our workforce’. I like what Fitzy stated, an Aussie needs to put on a nationwide jumper to the Ashes or to a sporting occasion it was at all times a Wallaby jersey. Perhaps not a lot now although.
Whereas sitting on the lounge percolating in my anger, it was episode three, the coaching session the day after the Welsh disaster, that basically lit my fuse. You see Gaggers, because the Turd stated to Jimmy Slips after our loss to Wales our issues have been completely as a result of the Wallabies ‘weren’t arduous sufficient!’ and on no account in any respect as a result of:
- We had a coach with no thought in any respect in any facet of truly teaching rugby or, because it grew to become crystal clear to me, in folks administration.
- A coach that left our facet undermanned and underprepared with the facet he chosen and the coaches he assembled. Two unproven NRL coaches, one in command of assault, one in every of defence. A former AFL coach in Neil Craig in command of ‘excessive efficiency’, which appeared from the footage to contain getting the coach coffees and reinforcing his maniacal concepts. What additionally aroused my sense of incredulity was the sheer scale of the assist employees. It was a solid of hundreds and a few both didn’t converse or a minimum of didn’t converse on digicam anyhow. But solely the French man questioned the coach round his stupefying choice round not telling the workforce about Skelton’s harm. This one second to me highlighted the madness of this coach; in making an attempt to govern the media and bluff and bluster them across the harm he really destabilises the workforce, his workforce, our workforce, by holding the announcement again till the day of the check! If all of it wasn’t simply so desperately ham-fisted and dumb you’d practically must chortle.
- A coach who actively partook in job interviews with rival unions simply previous to, and certain throughout, the working of the RWC.
- A coach who spent like a drunken, sexy sailor on shore go away. Overspending by $5,000,000.00 (that’s 5 million to these in Western Australia) on the depressing marketing campaign. What would an additional $5m within the coffers imply to, oh I dunno, a workforce based mostly in Mexico proper now?
Nope, we sucked as a result of ‘we’ weren’t arduous sufficient. Yep, neglect sport plans, or an skilled #10, neglect that we left maybe our greatest two gamers at residence and that we used 38 captains. Neglect that the Turd flogged gamers three coaching days every week throughout the RWC, immediately resulting in mushy tissue accidents to maybe our greatest weapons in Skelton and Tupou. Nope, it’s Australian rugby’s fault. Effectively it was any individual’s fault, however actually not the coach’s although.
It appears Gaggers that the one factor that stood between our gamers and World Cup glory was the majority buy of Viagra: our workforce simply weren’t arduous sufficient. I really feel so silly, the reply was apparent. It was the ‘flaccidity’ of our males in gold that purchased us all collective, abject rugby humiliation. And he’s proper. What’s the purpose of getting Massive Willy as our skipper if he’s not arduous sufficient? I look ahead to his Japanese workforce desirous to take the sector and displaying their hardness for all to see. That’ll be some nationwide anthem!
What full and utter rot.
My remaining takeaway for the three episodes solely bolstered, for me, how far faraway from any sense of rugby actuality the Turd was. Our nationwide facet have been handicapped by him being of their rugby universe, and along with his departure it’s goodbye, good luck and good riddance. Our gamers deserved higher than what they received. They deserve respect and admiration for the efforts they gave and sacrifices they made and the worth they paid.
Perhaps the Turd and I do agree on one factor he’s stated since his departure: it might appear him leaving has left Australian rugby in a greater place in any case.
Amen to that.
The Hosstradamus Prophecies.
Tremendous Rugby Spherical 1 is lastly right here with he instances, groups and fearless predictions:
All groups courtesy rugby.com.au
All protection particulars on STAN.
Friday 23 February 5:05 pm AEDT – Chiefs v Crusaders at FMG Stadium on Stan Sport
Generational change and weak, or extra of the identical from the South Island rugby manufacturing unit, the Crusaders. Tah reject and new Saders coach Rob Penney will get to point out his credentials this Friday with the 2023 remaining rematch to kick off the season. For all of the speak of no Mo’unga it’s the lack of Sam Whitelock and the harm sidelining of Will Jordan that I feel go away them uncovered.
Whereas the Chiefs have additionally farewelled the odd useful participant, they appear the extra settled of the 2. I need to additionally admit I’m curious to see D-Mac at #10, that might be particular.
Fearless Prediction: Chiefs by 8.
Referee: Nic Berry Assistant Referees: Jordan Manner, Reuben Keane
Friday 23 February 7:35 pm AEDT – Melbourne Rebels v ACT Brumbies at AAMI Park on Stan Sport
I think about it will likely be a reduction for the Rebs to get on the sector and simply play rugby and for 100 minutes let all of the latest noise and stress disappear into the background. I stated final week, it’s straightforward to overlook the truth that they’ve assembled the most effective roster of their historical past. They’ve a pack to match or beat any. They’ve an thrilling younger #10, with tempo and talent out large. For my part, the Rebs must win and win early to maintain the demons and noise at bay and make this season their finest ever. Profitable modifications every little thing.
The Ponies, nicely, they’re the Ponies. They’ll be methodical and ruthless. However no 7As, for mine, offers the Reb’s the sting.
Fearless Prediction: Rebels by 9
Referee: Angus Gardner Assistant Referees: Matt Kellahan, George Myers
Friday 23 February 10:00 pm AEDT – Western Pressure v Hurricanes at HBF Park on Stan Sport
A late coaching harm to Izaac Rodda and with newly minted skipper Jeremy Williams out with concussion leaves the Pressure a bit mild on the tight 5, however with new signings Nic White, Ben Donaldson and Will Harris I reckon the Western mob are extra full facet than in years passed by. The problem, because it at all times is, can be securing sufficient ball for the fairies to prance about.
The Hurricanes, like different NZ sides are with no host of big names presently away on a Contiki Yen Frenzy for a yr or so. The largest of those names is one Ardie ‘Three-Knees’ Savea. Presumably the world’s finest participant during the last 5 years. And that alone is sufficient for me.
Fearless Prediction: Farce by 12.
Referee: Damon Murphy Assistant Referees: Graham Cooper, Jordan Kaminski
Saturday 24 February 2:35 pm AEDT – Blues v Fijian Drua at Semenoff Stadium on Stan Sport
Can the Drua be the Drua from spherical 1?
Fearless Prediction: Sure, sure they will. Drua by 14.
Referee: Ben O’Keeffe Assistant Referees: Stu Curran, Jackson Henshaw
Saturday 24 February 5:05 pm AEDT – Highlanders v Moana Pasifika at Forsyth Barr Stadium on demand on Stan Sport
Fearless Prediction: The earlier MP merge with Rebels the higher. Landers by 20.
Referee: Brendon Pickerill Assistant Referees: James Mabey, Marcus Playle
Saturday 24 February 7:35 pm AEDT – Queensland Reds v NSW Waratahs at Suncorp Stadium on Stan Sport and Channel 9
I do know you’re anticipating some lengthy winded waffle. So I’ll hold it temporary. Will probably be NSW males in opposition to no matter they name these QPRQ gamers.
Fearless Prediction: Tahs by 27.
Referee: Paul Williams Assistant Referees: Dan Waenga, Mike Winter
What a Mouthful.
No, not the brand new Kurtley Beale musical, however as an alternative, the regulation of unintended penalties. What occurs when good intentions, result in actual world and sensible problems? You already know, like not with the ability to breathe for instance.
Attention-grabbing learn on stuff.co.nz about our very personal Aussie gamers showing lower than enamoured with the brand new and world rugby mandated, ‘good’ mouthguard. It appears with a purpose to accommodate the brand new know-how, these mouthguards are literally thicker than non-smart model and in some instances, the place respiratory by way of the nostril is both tough or not potential some gamers like Joe Dust McDermott might want to apply for a ‘medical exemption’ or ignore sporting them altogether, which carries dangers of its personal, because the report additionally mentions:
‘Regardless of the apparent dangers, some elite gamers have chosen to not put on mouthguards up to now. However wanting a medical exemption, which should be permitted by World Rugby, gamers should now put on the good mouthguard to be eligible for the HIA1 protocol. Put merely, if a participant chooses to not put on the mouthguard throughout video games – even throughout a coaching week – and is noticed with a suspected concussion throughout a Tremendous Rugby sport, they won’t be eligible for an HIA verify and a potential return. As an alternative, they are going to be eliminated and never allowed again on.’
Maybe concussion might not be a problem if gamers begin choking to loss of life on the sector as an alternative?
7As poses a typical sense and sensible resolution. Good article, nicely value a learn.
Friday’s Goss with Hoss.
Lol not LOL.
Information Thursday arvo that Tah and Wallabies centre Lol Foketi was taken away from coaching in an ambulance with a suspected neck harm. rugby.com.au studies:
“Foketi was taken to the Prince of Wales Hospital in Randwick by ambulance following the incident which occurred throughout the area session this morning. The membership is awaiting the outcomes from the scans and Foketi’s household are with him in hospital. Membership representatives have been readily available to supply assist all through the day.”
From all in rugby right here hoping Lol recovers rapidly and that his household are nicely supported.
Extra Yapp.
New Wallaroos coach Jo Yapp tells rugby.com.au all of the issues we need to hear: “prime 4 or bust!”.
No one cares.
John ‘No one’ Eales weighs in on Wallaby captain hypothesis along with his relatively helpful perception. rugby.com.au has extra.
Fantasy Suggestions.
Nope, not Dolly Parton’s newest biggest hits album, however your likelihood to enrol within the official G&GR Tremendous Rugby Fantasy League Crew Comp and separate SRP tipping contest. Yow will discover particulars right here courtesy of G&GR resident IT nerd, Hydie. Because of Superbru for internet hosting the competitions.
Kiddy Camp.
Famed former nationwide defensive coach and present nationwide underneath 20s coach, Nathan Gray, has introduced a 40 sturdy camp by way of rugby.com.au .
The North is Killing the Sport.
Perhaps not his actual quote, however it’s actually the vibe NZR head honcho Mark Robinson was placing out on this stuff.co.nz bit about his pending journey to the NH to speak to severe rugby of us.
The Final Phrase.
It’s becoming that large Nella shut us out at present with a quote from the Eddie Horror Present:
‘I wasn’t nervous about taking part in. I used to be nervous about dropping.’
Go the Tahs
Hoss – out.