Greetings and salutations. It’s Friday’s Rugby Information time once more, and take a look at match rugby is again child!
Right now we name emergency providers first up in ‘Fractured Fortress’. Go to each Aussie fan’s favorite second aspect for ‘Tahriffic Workforce’. Decrease your voice and develop your horizons in ‘It’s a Man’s World’. Soar throughout the ditch to go to the nuns with ‘Absolutely Humble Bro’. And all aboard for ‘Friday’s Goss With Hoss’, responding to an SOS from Anna Meares to elucidate to our Olympic hockey gamers that ‘Jack & Coke’ is a drink, not a purchasing record. C’est la vie.
Fractured Fortress?
Saturday, 10 August. Wallabies v South Africa. Suncorp Stadium Brisbane. 2.00pm AEST. Kick-off 2.55pm.
‘Hi there 000.‘
‘I’d wish to report a house invasion in Brisbane. We thought it was safe and protected, however not now. There gave the impression to be 23 of ’em, wearing inexperienced and bloody large items at that.’
‘What did they do?‘
‘They spoke in some guttural German/Dutch/half chewing a kitten dialect and nicely, simply ran amok. We couldn’t cease them. They broke into our home, trampled our younger, stole some silverware and ran off with our rugby delight as nicely, that’s what. They ran outdoors, jumped right into a ready bus that had a water boy with a shit-eating grin on his dial. Ship assist, a couple of elephant weapons and a few stretchers now.‘
‘Inform them to ask for St Joe once they get right here. Please hurry’
You get my drift proper? If not, you had been almost certainly educated in South Australia, or worse, observe the AFL (simply received a shiver down my backbone).
There may be simply no situation the place I can see our Wallabies getting anyplace close to this South African aspect on Saturday. None. Nada. Squat. Bubcus. With over 5,000 take a look at caps throughout their match day squad and and 22 World Cup winners (12 of whom are twin RWC winners) they land on our shores already a extra harmful aspect than that which has gone again to again Payments. Particularly since Tony Brown received his filthy hobbit palms on these large orcs. All of us knew they had been large, blunt, brutal devices, however they’ve added a level of subtlety and deception to their play that was hitherto unknown.
Our lot are coming off three wins on the trot. However whereas all of us bathed within the pure radiance of a victor’s mild, it was solely Wales and Georgia. And to be truthful, none of these victories had been emphatic, ruthless or convincing, had been they?
Which brings me to tomorrow arvo. Simply what can be a suitable end result? Will it’s outcomes pushed or, maybe extra appropriately, efficiency pushed? What would be the indicators of enchancment?
For me, I want to see extra of the Irish model, brief passing between forwards on the line to vary the purpose of assault. Or that ‘out the again’, off the hip cross to a sweeping fairy (a la Jonny Sexton). That majestic transfer of the Orish just lately utilized in each exams within the land of the Dutch Grime Farmers (right here at 4.00m into the clip on Youtube – luxurious) confirmed that brains can certainly unlock brawn. I really like the screening of the true ball recipient by the 2 forwards who legally shear left and proper because the cross is thrown. That people is pure rugby poetry. However are our lot at this level but?
Maybe the Oirish is perhaps shite dinner visitors for at all times crapping themselves within the cup. However, the truth that we now have a former coach of theirs with some performs with their rugby DNA, can our lot throw a couple of counter punches and discover a method?
One can solely hope that the MOs guarantee a quick sport to convey fatigue in as an element and the Wallabies discover competitiveness on the set piece and be combative on the ruck. On that alone I’m genuinely excited to see Tizzano’s efficiency. I’ve at all times appreciated his sport. He appears barely unhinged and that’s precisely what we’re going to wish in opposition to these Bok behemoths. Somebody who simply reveals no respect for all times nor limb and simply will get in there and scraps and brawls and competes for each inch.
Fearless Prediction: I’ll be inebriated and cheering loudly regardless. However sadly, it’s the Boks by rather a lot. Actually something lower than the Boks by 19 can be an ethical victory to us.
Wallabies (15-1): Tom Wright; Andrew Kellaway, Len Ikitau, Hunter Paisami, Filipo Daugunu; Noah Lolesio, Jake Gordon; Harry Wilson, Carlo Tizzano, Rob Valetini; Lukhan Salakaia-Loto, Nick Frost, Allan Alaalatoa, Matt Faessler, Issac Kailea
Replacements: Josh Nasser, James Slipper, Zane Nonggorr, Jeremy Williams, Luke Reimer, Tate McDermott, Tom Lynagh, Dylan Pietsch
Springboks (15-1): Willie le Roux; Cheslin Kolbe, Jesse Kriel, Damian de Allende, Kurt-Lee Arendse; Sacha Feinberg-Mngomezulu, Cobus Reinach; Elrigh Louw, Pieter-Steph du Toit, Siya Kolisi (captain), RG Snyman, Eben Etzebeth, Frans Malherbe, Bongi Mbonambi, Ox Nche
Replacements: Malcolm Marx, Gerhard Steenekamp, Vincent Koch, Ben-Jason Dixon, Marco van Staden, Kwagga Smith, Grant Williams, Handre Pollard
Match Officers: Referee: Luke Pearce (Eng) ARs: Paul Williams (NZ) & Hollie Davidson (Sco) TMO: Ben Whitehouse (Wal)
Tahriffic Workforce.
No surprises the Monday-Thursday crapparazzi ignored probably the largest rugby information on the earth this 12 months: the Tahs teaching construction for 2025 has been confirmed.
Becoming a member of Chuckles at Tahland this 12 months can be Dan Palmer. The previous Wallaby (and former Tah) adopted Chuckles to Leicester from the frozen pornographic tundra of the ACT and equally has adopted him again to the Tahs. DP will tackle the assistant set piece coach duties, and one would suppose he’ll be reasonably excited to work with Angus Bell, Taniela Tupou, Isaac Kailea, Barge Arse Leota, Porky Porecki, Julian Heaven, Maihe Vailanu (who’d be a Wallaby if unhurt), Charlie Gamble, Ben Grant and Angelo Smith, to call however a couple of.
Additionally becoming a member of is notorious Jonah Lomu highway kill, Mike Catt. Catt is a 3 time RWC participant, together with the 2003 win in Sydney, aka #wewuzrobbed. After retiring from taking part in, the 2003 World Cup winner has coached with London Irish, England, Italy, and Eire. He additionally doesn’t fee Eddie Jones, so I like him already. Catt (who sports activities an OBE for providers to visitors calming) can be assistant assault coach.
Persevering with the Brumbies (and ex-Tah) connection, one in all my all time favorite Ponies additionally joins in. Lachie McCaffrey would be the assistant coach for defence. I liked his aggression and abrasive method, plus the ability he performed the sport with. I sit up for a bit extra starch in our meat eaters subsequent season.
The one draw back, probably the most overrated centre to ever play the sport, Tom Carter, returns as Head of Athletic Efficiency. The mouth from the south returns from his function with the Australian Ladies’s 7s program, a program that delivered precisely zero Olympic medals throughout his 5.5 12 months tenure overseeing identical.
After a disgraceful 2024 it could seem the great ship Waratah has been righted, repaired, retrimmed and prepared for 2025. Does a Cinderella story of final to first beckon? Might it’s finished? Final to first in only one season? Is it attainable? Is it possible? Sure. Sure it’s.
It’s a Man’s World.
Nicely not less than in girls’s Olympic boxing it’s.
Now take a breath, earlier than you go ‘yikes’ and we go careering down the gender bender path. For the document, my private opinion is that any such choice is private. It’s your journey, your enterprise and your name. And albeit, I couldn’t give a tinker’s cuss about it. You’re both particular person, otherwise you ain’t. The remaining is, nicely, simply window dressing.
You might come to the Ponderosa wearing a full physique stocking, roll across the flooring, suckin’ up grime and inform me you determine as a Dyson 3000 for all I care. Actually, in case you do a half respectable job and get these Maltesers out from underneath the again bookshelf (how lengthy do they preserve ya reckon?) I’ll invite you again.
However. Must you select to take part in a sport, particularly a contact sport, that has as its central premise the infliction of bodily hurt on one other human for benefit (like boxing or rugby) then for mine, no matter donk you’re born with have to be the solely donk thought-about for entry into stated competitors.
Now, I acknowledge that’s maybe a tad unfair on a participant, an particular person participant. Nevertheless it’s an entire lot fairer to the lots of different members in that sport. With the rising science round CTE from head trauma shouldn’t the protection of the various outweigh the precise to take part of the few? Shouldn’t security be the overarching and solely guideline?
This isn’t about blame, neither is it about gender; it’s about an individual’s security. That certainly is the one matter for dialogue. In addition to, I believe you’ll discover most Australians are supporters of particular person rights. Perhaps not as a lot because the Kiwis although, who insist on calling every little thing ‘Trans-Tasman’.
Absolutely Humble Bro.
NV v Argentina. Sky Stadium NZ. 4.30pm AEST. Kick-off 5.05pm after the Hakarena and blubbering South Individuals.
Apparently there’s additionally a sport in NZ this weekend with the common-or-garden cuz chilly bros taking up the runners as much as the English within the Falkland Island actuality present, ‘It’s a Knockout’.
The Nearlies have a brand new skipper this week with the throat slitter himself Edward Scissorhands Ardie Savea to guide the workforce 58% wearing black. For as soon as I’m in agreeance with KARL, not about engaging sheep however in regards to the aspect usually trying fairly formidable, despite the fact that they seem a wee bit undersized within the locks.
The beginning of BB at #15, the dropping of Ioane at #13 and the return of Will Jordan from the pine freeway (all of us neglect simply how bloody good he’s, nicely besides in RWC finals that’s; he shat the mattress there) offers the ABs their most potent attacking look this 12 months. ALB is a type of midfield generals each aspect craves; he’ll convey stability, calm, defensive management and attacking distribution that’ll greater than get the job finished for the house aspect on this one.
Fearless Prediction: The FISMs will present loads of ardour, struggle, resolve and braveness. Then the anthem will end and the minstrels will win by 30 and the FISMs to be 4th for and in opposition to on the RC ladder.
Principally Black: 15 Beauden Barrett, 14 Sevu Reece, 13 Anton Lienert-Brown, 12 Jordie Barrett, 11 Mark Tele’a, 10 Damian McKenzie, 9 TJ Perenara, 8 Ardie Savea (c), 7 Dalton Papali’i, 6 Ethan Blackadder, 5 Sam Darry, 4 Tupou Vaa’i, 3 Tyrel Lomax, 2 Codie Taylor, 1 Ethan De Groot
Replacements: 16 Asafo Aumua, 17 Ofa Tu’ungafasi, 18 Fletcher Newell, 19 Josh Lord, 20 Wallace Sititi, 21 Cortez Ratima, 22 Rieko Ioane, 23 Will Jordan
The Anthem Cryers: 1 Thomas Gallo, 2 Ignacio Ruiz, 3 Eduardo Bello, 4 Franco Molina, 5 Pedro Rubiolo, 6 Pablo Matera (capt.), 7 Marcos Kremer, 8 Juan Martín González, 9 Gonzalo Bertranou, 10 Santiago Carreras, 11 Mateo Carreras, 12 Santiago Chocobares, 13 Lucio Cinti, 14 Matías Moroni, 15 Juan Cruz Mallía
Replacements: 16 Agustín Creevy, 17 Mayco Vivas, 18 Joel Sclavi, 19 Tomás Lavanini, 20 Efraín Elías, 21 Joaquín Oviedo, 22 Lautaro Bazán Vélez, 23 Tomás Albornoz
Match Officers: Referee: Aussie Gus Gardner ARs: Nic ‘I dont need to be on the identical land mass as that turd Erasmus’ Berry (Aus) & Andrea Piardi (Ita)TMO: Brett ‘Jus joyful to be outta the home’ Cronan (Aus)
For Sale. Bought.
On the market: one residence with heat beer, stodgy rugby, oh and free leather-based patches, good chap.
In an indication of the monetary instances the house of rugby, Twickers, has been offered to a dodgy insurance coverage firm and can now be referred to as ‘Flood cowl? Test your coverage particulars, there’s no such factor! Stadium’, or Allianz for brief. Sir Clive actually has an opinion on planetrugby.com
I have to admit I’m a little bit of a traditionalist at coronary heart, an idea I’ll develop upon in subsequent Friday’s ‘So what in case you’ve misplaced the mortgage compensation, your loved ones, pals, integrity and the need to reside. Playing’s enjoyable (gamble responsibly) ‘ Bet365 Rugby Information.
Pea Blower Gods.
Fascinating tidbit. Ought to Aussie Gus and Kiwi BOK officiate as deliberate in the course of the RC they’ll each, individually, grow to be probably the most capped Check referees of their residence nations. BOK will go to 47 exams, overtaking Paul Honiss of NZ. And Gus will go to 48, equally overtaking Stu Dickinson (a blast from the previous).
Say what you want, however I’m a BOK fan. I like the best way he lets a sport play and he has a terrific manner and relationship with the perimeters. He’s additionally a useless set ringer for a younger Elvis Presley. Love to listen to him slip an Elvis reference into a call or participant chat when miced up.
As for Gus, he’s Aussie, he’s good. Nicely finished to each gents and nicely deserved.
The Legend of Soiled Harry
Gunnedah turncoat (and NSW traitor) Harry Wilson, received time within the nets this week with Australian cricket workforce member (and second most annoying particular person on the earth to look at bat behind ‘Tremendous Twitch’ and Chairman of OCD Australia, OCD Australia, OCD Australia, Steve Smith) when Marnus Labbuscagney, Labbisscarnay, Marnus anyone, paid him a go to at camp Wallaby. rugby.com.au has extra.
Tall tales abound a few legendary 100 Soiled Harry as soon as scored as a schoolboy off simply 35 balls. Fact be informed, I’ve seen a video of that innings, and the bowling was to cricket what Wednesdays are to rugby journalism: utter, indeniable garbage.
Persist with rugby Large H, and for God’s sake no sand papering balls. Keep match.
Fozzie? What the, what the, what the?
Fascinating and insightful feedback from Hodor Whitelock this week in regards to the ‘rescue’ of Fozzie Foster as coach in late 2022. For me, it’s the utterly dispassionate, singular focus and ruthless streak in Hodor’s feedback that present you precisely why the ABs had been maybe the very best sporting aspect, of any code, on the earth for 10 years from 2008-2018. stuff.co.cuzzybro has extra.
Lion, turned Lion tamer.
Fascinating learn on planetrugby.com that Aussie Geoff Parling may probably grow to be the primary ever former Lion to teach in opposition to the Lions subsequent 12 months.
Rugby Nirvana.
This weekend sees G&GR recommence the type of protection that made us the #1 ranked rugby web site named G&GR on the earth throughout RWC2023. We may have protection of each TRC match. And it will get higher, we’ll additionally cowl each NH Wallaby match in addition to the blockbuster matches the place NZ or SA is perhaps taking part in.
Bris and KARL kick us off this weekend with articles revealed Saturday after the matches. G&GR has you lined.
Condolences
Information this week of the passing of a member of the family of Taniela Tupou. I hope the massive man is surrounded by the love and care of his household and pals on this troublesome time. From all at G&GR to the broader Tupou household, we hope the tears of sorrow will quickly dry and the heat and love of his reminiscence will shine and reside ceaselessly.
Till subsequent week. Go the Wallabies
Hoss – out.